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Warped

30/6/2017

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I enjoyed this Chinglish, spotted at a "Self help desk" in a furniture shop last week, particularly the totally opposite aims of "wrapping" or "warping" your fragile items!
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Like a fish

28/6/2017

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I've managed to keep my swimming going this term apart from a couple of weeks off with a cold. I do a kilometre each time - that's 20 lengths - usually all breaststroke. It's supposed to be a gentle exercise compared to, say, running but I find I get twinges, cramps, neck pinches ear infections and verrucas. So it's hardly a risk-free activity. I've still got 20 visits credit on my card, which should get me through the Summer. 
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Shell be fired

26/6/2017

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I can just imagine the thought process of the sales lady; "Now we've got a lot of washing powder to sell. Let's have a promotional supermarket display. What shall we craft to emphasise the high quality cleaning abilities of this product? Oh, I know - a huge tank"
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Tally ho!

24/6/2017

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The British Consul-General was in Kunming a couple of days ago and I found myself invited to a celebration of 45 years of China-UK ambassadorial relations. There were about 50 business people in attendance, of which just 10 or so were actually British! I met up with my old colleagues from Robert's School which was fun [see below] and the "typically British food" on offer - roast chicken, curry, fish & chips, mashed potatoes, etc - was rather good.
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Going, going, gone

22/6/2017

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My University hosted a pleasant leaving party today for the half dozen teachers who will not be continuing next term. Amongst them is Nancy [talking to me in photo above] who is transferring to Kunming College. JD loves to play with her kids and we have become good friends over the last couple of years. Hopefully we'll stay in touch.
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The event included a number of interesting performances such as a Tea Ceremony, Laos and Dai dancing and a kung fu demonstration.
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I also found out that one of foreign teachers I work with has just decided to  leave, and a new teacher who had been lined up has quit already! That means I'll be in a team of just two teachers next term where we formerly had 4-5. Could be interesting.
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Going out

20/6/2017

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An interesting comment on how Chinese teenagers see themselves, compared to their peers from other countries. Some truth there!
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Unreliable

18/6/2017

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Wise, if nonsense, advice!
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Pop, snap, tug

16/6/2017

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JD's Kindergarten class had an Open Morning today for Father's Day. The class had a presentation about Fathers [left] and then we made fancy cameras with our child [right]. After that, there were Father+Son running races and a Tug-of-War between the Dads of different classes. Our class were the Tug-of-War champions after 4 wins and one disputed loss. My muscles ache!
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Wheely good

14/6/2017

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JD spotted his name on a shop front the other day [above] and can draw himself quite well, too [right]. He can also very nearly write his Chinese name  朱 品 修 .
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Turning the Corner

12/6/2017

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This week sees the last of my English Corners for this term. I go along from 6.30-8.00pm fortnightly and try to bring along a fun speaking activity to get the attendees chatting about different topics. Although for me it's part of my job, attendance is voluntary for the students.  We usually see 10-20 coming along each week and meet outside the library - weather permitting. The picture shows regular "AndyChaser" who is off to pastures new at the end of this academic year.
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Booboo

10/6/2017

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I wonder if she knows what her T-shirt actually says?
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Floored thinking

8/6/2017

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JD is becoming more and more independent these days.
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Whether it's dressing himself, getting his favourite DVD playing or suddenly deciding our car needs washing (and then doing it), he's full of self-confidence. Most of the time this is to be encouraged but, when you find him "cleaning the garage floor" with a dishcloth because it is "a bit dirty", you have to set some guidelines!
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Coin you explain this?

6/6/2017

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JD's battery-operated money box had
instructions that started well enough, but...

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Sampling dumplings

4/6/2017

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JD and I had a fun lunch yesterday with an old colleague of mine, Lilly, who is now studying in Paris. She took us (and a handful of her other friends) to an upmarket dumpling restaurant. She knows the owner and he very kindly agreed to let us try our hand at making dumplings for his store once we had finished eating. So the Head Chef demonstrated the technique to us and we all had a go. It as harder than it looked, of course, but JD loved crimping the dough on the meat and anticipating eating his creations.

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Although our finished products looked a bit flat, they tasted yummy. I suggested to the owner that he should advertise Birthday Parties where children come with their friends, make dumplings and eat them afterwards. He said it was a great idea and proceeded to pay for all our food! Nice guy!
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BoredĀ of the Dance

2/6/2017

 
Today was Children's Day in China and JD's Kindergarten took over the Kunming City Stadium for the morning to allow each class to perform their well-practised dances.
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One parent of each student had been drafted in to perform with the children and Jiajia made her excuses. So I was one of four Dads along with twenty-five Mums! We've been rehearsing for 6 weeks.
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Our performance today was 11th out of 16, so a certain amount of tedium had crept into the audience as we began to strut our stuff. We started with some hip-hop and then transitioned into traditional ethnic dances. JD did his part this time (having refused to do anything at all at the dress rehearsal, probably because I wasn't able to make it to that practice) and afterwards Jiajia said, "It was beyond my imagination" which I think was a compliment.

My good wife brought our video camera with us too ...and then completely forgot to use it! But they say there will be a professionally put together DVD of the whole event in due course.

Apparently we won first prize ...as did every one of the dance troupes. This is socialist China after all! Altogether it took four hours to get through and then we were told not to bother taking our kids back to school for the afternoon. I'm not sure UK school would get away with that sort of thing!
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Snack attacker

1/6/2017

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I wonder of the KFC staff know that their aprons
declare them to be "dangerous people"?

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    paul hider

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    Paul Hider lives and works in Kunming (SW China) and regularly updates this blog about his life there.

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