Blog

Line and cheating

24/11/2022

I woke yesterday to text messages informing us that all Primary and Secondary schools are closing again, for at least three days. Yes, COVID is still perceived as a major threat to life in China and, with 100 positive cases in Kunming (pop: 7m) and three deaths in Beijing (4 hours flight away) life here grinds to a halt, once again! Today my University went into lockdown. We will probably have to teach online again next week. Groan!

Meanwhile, we all have to queue for 30-45 minutes every day or two to be tested, and guards check everyone's phone health codes at work, on buses, in parks and shops etc. After three years of this it really has gone beyond tiresome, especially when the rest of the world (using vaccines that actually work!) seems to have moved on.

P.S. As I suspected, all teaching is online again until further notice...

Very Young Pioneer

24/10/2022

JD's class sat through a 2-hour video speech by Premier Xi last week, followed by an hour-long lesson quizzing the students on Communist Party ideology. He was one of the top students, showing his deep knowledge and understanding, and winning a Young Pioneers award [right] !

What he says at home about Chinese politics isn't necessarily quite so effusive! But, when told to, he does what he needs to do to spout the required propaganda...

Just something I red

30/9/2022

This graphic shows the current world reaction to COVID-19. Blue means "No restrictions", Orange is "Limited restrictions" while Red is "Full restrictions to maintain a zero-COVID policy". China is on its own!

So I started my term doing online lesson, JD's school has been closed this week because of two COVID cases found in a town near Kunming and, as now (with 25 more cases found) we are all required to attend a testing centre every other day. Will it never end?

Nominative determinism

30/4/2022

Sometimes your name just defines what job you will do.

It's bin fixed

4/4/2022

One thing I like about the Chinese people is the default position of fixing things, rather than just chucking them away. Usually, anyway.

CPC, see?

8/12/2021

I was asked by my University to attend a "Thematic Briefing on the Sixth Plenary Session of the Nineteenth CPC Central Committee" yesterday. To be fair, the organisers tried their best to make it accessible and fairly interesting (Powerpoints in English, real-time translations, phone app "games", gifts, etc) but there's only so much fun you can wring out of "XiJingPing Marxism Thought"!?

No fishing

26/11/2021

Mobile phones in China get various messages from Government sources every day. I usually ignore them but yesterday, just out of interest, I translated one of them. It was typically bonkers!

Warming the earth

18/10/2021

This is JD [bottom row, towards the right] as his class are about to launch into a patriotic song they've been learning recently, Lyrics include, "The glorious People's Party is the sun that warms the ground in China!" ...helps explain global warming.

Having a gander at the propaganda

10/8/2021

Phones here get regular unsolicited texts from "the powers that be". Translating them gives a little insight into the 24/7 propaganda that is part of Chinese life (especially if you can read Chinese characters!).

Complete Poster Coverage

2/7/2021

Posters have been put up all around town over the last month or so, reminding people that the great Communist Party of China is celebrating 100 years (yesterday). Happy Anniversary, CPC! My phone translates the poster content as a heady mix of self-congratulatory and confusing messages. Most Chinese people I know just shrug. Politics and its associated propaganda are not a conversational priority here.

Board and tyred

24/3/2021

This is a fairly common sight in the Chinese countryside - boards laid alongside the wheel arches of parked cars and vans

It's taken me some time to find out what the reason is. I'm told on good authority it is to stop dogs weeing on the tyres, because of the belief that their urine degrades tyres and causes punctures. I'm not sure dogs really do that, or that their urine has any effect at all but hey, this is China! Facts often have no bearing on local traditions.

Patriotic mopping?

18/2/2021

I saw this sign in a public toilet the other day. Apart from the confusion between "sweeping" and "mopping", I was bemused as to why they were asking the toilet-users to do the job. And what does the tagline bottom left mean? ..."Patriotic Health Seven Special Actions"?? What's patriotic about mopping a toilet and what are the other Six Actions?

Looks all white

24/11/2020

It's that time of year again when hundreds of peasant workers descend on Kunming's trees and paint the bottom of the trunks white. But why?

The simple answer is, nobody really seems to know! Everyone has their own theory - to protect them from bright sunlight. to prevent the bark cracking, it looks beautiful, it stops insects crawling up, it stops cars hitting them, Chinese tradition, etc. Whatever the reason, the Government spends a huge sum each Winter decorating thousands of Kunming trees. Odd, to say the least!

Tweaked week

2/10/2020

Unusually this year, Chinese National Day and Mid-Autumn Festival fall on the same day, so there is a full week of holiday throughout China. Apart, that is, from my University where we have just have one day off! They blame COVID, and promise we'll get an extra week in the Winter holiday. But I'm suspicious ...all the other Universities and schools in Kunming have got a full week. Mean!

Catch-up

18/8/2020

One of the most frustrating things about life in China - perhaps THE most frustrating thing - is the constant blocking of large parts of of the Internet by the powers that be. Useful sites like Google, Facebook, blogs, YouTube and the BBC are only accessible by using special software. And occasionally, even that software is blocked for a few days because of some "meeting in Beijing" or a "sensitive anniversary" or something, I'm back in today after three annoying days with little news, little personal contacts and no blog updates. Catching up now!

Flagging up the party

20/7/2020

These signs have been popping up all over Kunming recently exhorting people to "Follow the Communist Party forever". I wonder what exactly the local people think when they see something like this - it's not wise to ask. Maybe they view it as laughable propaganda, as I do, or maybe it engenders some sense of patriotism or belonging. I don't know. But I can imagine how the British public would react if something similar happened the London's streets!

Seventh heaven?

12/6/2020

Good to see China in the top ten "safest countries to
be living in at this time in the COVID19 pandemic"...

...bit worrying to see the UK limping in at number 68.

High recognition

22/4/2020

This was part of a long and very "Chinese" speech which appeared on my phone yesterday. It gives an idea of the narrative now being promoted by the Chinese Communist Party as the COVID-19 outbreak here gradually comes under control:

Commiestruction

20/3/2020

Yeah, let's concrete over those communist fields !

Green with envy

8/3/2020

It took me about seven months to organise the necessary application paperwork and another five months waiting to see if the the Chinese Government agreed to grant it, but this week I finally got my "Foreigner Permanent Resident ID Card" (aka Green Card).

It not only means that I don't have to get a new visa each year for the next decade but, more importantly, I'm not tied to any one visa-issuing educational institution. I am free to pick and choose whatever jobs I like, since my work visa is already secure. And there are much better paid jobs out there than the one I currently have, so watch this space!

Crossing a line

12/2/2020

Some parts of the city are slowly opening up again after the Spring Festival break and the Coronavirus shutdown - a few restaurants are open, supermarket shelves are being stocked again, more cars on the roads, even lines being painted down the middle of streets!?

But the prevailing feeling among the local Chinese here is that the outbreak will get even worse, that it can be spread in almost any way you can imagine, that businesses will go bust, and that we're all going to die....!!

Among the foreign community, it is a lot more measured - Yunnan is one of the least affected Provinces, the mortality rate is similar to flu, infected numbers are stabilising, businesses will bounce back and the worst is largely over. Trouble is, despite that attitude being based on facts, you really can't say it! You get accused of downplaying the emergency, of being cavalier in your actions and of not understanding the severity of it all. And it's all tied up with the differing cultures too, which is always a tricky one here. As I've said a lot recently, "Fear wins over Facts"!

Your life is mine

6/2/2020

Another Chinese mine disaster recently led to a total of 37 miners dead in the last two months. Last year 333 died in all, but the Government is saying its safety record is improving as 376 died the year before that. Not a job I'd wish on anybody.

Maths appeal

4/2/2020

I find the Chinese often do their maths in very strange ways, such as insisting on putting single digit numbers in the tens column. Please stop it! And then they have confusing questions like this…

Viral spiral

2/2/2020

COVID19 continues to spread through China (and some other parts of the world). Being in Kunming, we are quite far from the worst areas, but we still wear masks outside, have to go hunting for markets selling vegetables, and make do without buses, parks and the subway.

If I'm honest, I think the dangers are being over-exaggerated in our neck of the woods. So far, there have been 70 infected people in our Province of 46,000,000, so the chances of bumping into someone carrying the virus are incredibly small, let alone getting close enough to them to actually catch the infection. But science and facts often take second place to fear and rumors, especially here it seems,

Needs mask

26/1/2020

We flew back to China late today. The recent Coronavirus infection is spreading quickly and we had our masks ready as we arrived (as did all the other passengers). Our Province is far from the origin of the outbreak but that hasn't stopped the locals here panicking: supermarkets have been stripped of food, parks are closed, roads are empty and we are getting strident, but largely pointless, texts from JD's school and my University (eg "..if your throat feels dry, drink some water..."!!)