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Strawberry fields for Ava

31/1/2011

Cathy's uncle gave us an eclectic tour of the JingHong area today. We started at a strawberry-picking farm. Jiajia (Ava) claimed the best formed strawberry, Peter the largest and I the most [see photo, top right].

The next stop was a traditional Dai minority hospital to see some of their strange medicines and healing methods. No sooner had Cathy's uncle complained of a sore back than he was on his front with needles sticking out of him. He claimed it worked wonders. I couldn't say the same myself, after being persuaded to have a massage from the same doctor to try and fix my neck problems. It was a painful experience and left me sorer and stiffer for days to come!

After lunch in a traditional Dai house, we visited a pottery to see how they make their bowls and vases.

We saw a factory making enormous polished log tables from tree trunks on the way back to the hotel, tired!

Ava makes a new friend

Holi-dai

30/1/2011

Ava and I headed off for our holiday today - a 45 minute flight south to XiShuangBanna, a sub‐tropical part of our Province, near the Thai border. We both have friends in the area and quickly met up with Cathy (my Chinese teacher, centre in photo), her English friend Peter (taking the photo) and Ava's old schoolmate Lao Bie (who picked us up from the airport and took us out for a banquet of Dai minority food in the evening).

Sweet threat and Skype hype

29/1/2011

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I had lovely surprise "sweet treat" last week, sent by my UK friends Peter and Judy. They'd struggled to find anywhere selling my favourite Curly-wurlies so, when they did find a stash, they bought and sent 8 of them to me! "Bitter sweet" though, as I read in newspaper the next day that Cadbury have stopped making them (since their takeover by Kraft). I'm not happy about that!! And the same paper also warned that the Chinese Government is planning to block internet telephony ("Skype", to you and me) and force everyone to use a "China Telecomms" alternative. Guess who owns "China Telecomms"? So far, Skype still works but I'm bracing myself! It's a bit of a lifeline back to UK friends and family.

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Re Pete - if you can!

28/1/2011

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I came across a fiendish, if unintentional, twongue-twister the other day in a obituary for the actor Pete Postlethwaite (whose name is, in itself, tricky enough to say). Just try to repeat "thrift-shop suit" a few times!

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Red cROSS

26/1/2011

It was hard to keep a track of all the teachers at school who got really ill in the last few weeks of term (myself included). But two of our foreign teachers took things a step further. Jay has been in hospital for four days with a raging temperature and Ross [photo left] managed to collapse in the street! After a night in hosital and many tests, he's now convalescing at my flat for a few days. The tests didn't give a definitive reason for the pavement-dive, nor does he have any recollection of it happening. But school staff saw him 5 minutes beforehand and somebody, somwehere called an ambulance which got him to hospital. All a bit scary and mysterious. He's making a slow recovery, having cancelled the holiday flight he was due to take today. Poor chap!

A bite to eat

24/1/2011

... what is it with the Chinese feeling that no photo is complete without a "V" sign??

This was our school's end of term meal last night. They are big affairs these days with about 100 staff attending. I was on my best behaviour, as usual!

It's good to have some rest options ahead. I've been quite poorly of late (again!) and am currently on antibiotics for two separate infections!

Everywhere except China...

22/1/2011

A warm invite to all my blog readers outside of China, to click here and watch a video of me playing a demo language game at the recent Grand Opening of a new branch of my school in Qujing city. For thise living in China, I'm afraid this is one of the many sites blocked by "our" Government, bless 'em! I was discussing "censorship" with my class of (normally fairly canny) teenage students today, and they seemed blissfully unaware of the level of internet censorship in China, bless 'em!

Look left, look right ...and panic!

21/1/2011

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A car driving the wrong way down a one way street, a taxi scattering pedestrians as he fails to stop at a red light and a scooter careering too fast to avoid hitting somebody on the pavement with the ridiculously wide box strapped to its back. And all this was just my journey to school today!

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Doughn't go!

19/1/2011

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Today marked a sad day. My breadmaking machine was gifted to me back in 2005 by a VSO volunteer when it arrived for her from Australia, smashed to bits in the post, just as she quit. I managed to get it working with sellotape, screwdriver and superglue, and it was something of a lifeline, being 14 hours from the nearest decent bakers. Now, over 5 years and 150+ loaves later, it's finally making its last loaf. Dough leaks out, something electrical seems to be burning inside, the plug only works intermittently and my flour and yeast supplies have finished. More importantly, Ava has a new breadmaker machine at her flat and there's a decent bakers next to my school. So after this last loaf, it's into the communal rubbish tip, as I shed an emotional tear!

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A bit seally really

17/1/2011

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I guess wiping out a sealed sack is better than wiping out a sacked seal?

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Speak your mind

15/1/2011

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I had a bit of an insight into "being a Chinese teenager" this weekend. The word "patriotic" came up in our textbook and I told my students that I thought the Chinese were a lot more patriotic than the British. When they asked why I explained about British dissatisfaction with everything from the weather to the Government. But it turned out their "why" was asking why I thought Chinese teenagers were patriotic. I told them that every time I ask a student whether they love China, they always say "yes". I noticed some smirks at this and the most confident student in the class muttered, "They are just cheating you!". So I asked him if he loved China. "Of course", he replied. I asked the other students one by one and they all answered yes. "So are you all cheating me now?" I asked. Some furtive glances and nervous smiles made it clear that it was time to move on to another subject. Even after so many years here, it still amazes me how deep-seated the fear is amongst the Chinese to say or do anything against the accepted way. It seems that "speaking your mind" is quite literally a foreign concept.

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Knife to see you

13/1/2011

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Another visit to the airport yesterday to see Ava safely back to Kunming. And, of course, more amusing Chinglish - this time telling you things you can't take on the plane... namely "Controued Dirks"! I like the first example too, a "Since the lock". Work that one out!

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Food for thought

11/1/2011

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If you saw a couple having breakfast, would you ask "Who are eating breakfast there?" or "Who is eating breakfast there?". This is the sort of question I'm often asked at school by perplexed Chinese teachers. And, as ever, a seemingly simple question gets more complex the more you think about it. "That couple is having breakfast" or "That couple are having breakfast"? "The couple is old / are old?"?? All a bit mystifying when put on the spot!

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Taking a peak

10/1/2011

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There was a sudden peak in visitors to my blog last week - 189 separate visits from 125 unique visitors! A new record for the blog and a great way to start the New Year! Thanks for visiting!

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I swear it's true!

9/1/2011

Seeing Ava off at the airport (she's on her monthly trip to Shenzhen) always gives me to chance to hunt for new Chinglish. This time the airport had a shiny new sign showing travellers where to check-in by themselves and presumably, when it doesn't work ...cuss! Hehe!

In a flap

7/1/2011

Jiajia bought a hand-made bird cage in Simao last year and it's been hanging in the lounge looking very empty ever since then. So when we took down the Christmas tree decorations (those birds and the bees, you may recall) I had the inspiration to give the birds a new home, stuffed into the cage! I think it looks quite arty and, having found her favourite childhood doll in the cage a few months ago (sorry about that!) Ava is just relieved it's only birds now!

Shanghai-phen?

5/1/2011

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This is a goodie! The Chinese tells people to "wait outside the 1 metre line". But, misinterpret the dash as simply a dash (rather than the Chinese character for the number one) and the alternative translation apparently becomes equally possible (if ridiculously improbable!).

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She'll make milkshake mistake

3/1/2011

While I made a pasta dish for our dinner yesterday, Jiajia announced that she wanted to make a banana milkshake. I made one last week which we enjoyed, so I foolishly let her loose with a liquidiser and the ingredients. A few minutes later there was a whoosh and a sploosh and I walked into the dining room to find this sight [see photo]. Milk, yoghurt and pieces of banana covered the table, the floor and the walls! I've suggested that Jiajia stick to woks in future ...anything more complex seems to invite disaster!

Improbable but botanical

1/1/2011

Today was a sunny, if chilly at times, day. So Jiajia and I decided to drive out to Kunming's Botanical Gardens. We had been warned it wouldn't be at its best, with leafless trees and no flowers but, as we arrived, it seemed busy with visitors and we hoped for the best. Unfortunately it was as dull as predicted, although fresh air and birdsong are always better than Kunming's traffic and noise pollution.

As a fan of the bizarre, my highlights were the "possibly-a-bit-crazy" belly dancer who wandered around the park doing random dances [photo, top left], and the Herb Garden which, despite barbed wire and imposing locked gates, also had a massive hole in its wall which was all too easy to walk through [photo, top right]. Later I started chatting to some youngsters who wanted to practise their English, one of whom turned out to be a student at my school (albeit a different branch). Jiajia showed her disinterest at my "working holiday" by flaking out on the lawn, before being told off by the "lawn guard"!

Strawberry fields for Ava

Holi-dai

Sweet threat and Skype hype

Re Pete - if you can!

Red cROSS

A bite to eat

Everywhere except China...

Look left, look right ...and panic!

Doughn't go!

A bit seally really

Speak your mind

Knife to see you

Food for thought

Taking a peak

I swear it's true!

In a flap

Shanghai-phen?

She'll make milkshake mistake

Improbable but botanical

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