Blog

Uniformly odd

2/10/2019

JD's Primary School uniform was delivered last week - the boys get a bright pink tunic while the girls get blue!? It's either a very progressive decision or someone made a cock-up!

Jiajia was mumbling about the cost - she found the same clothes online for 50RMB but the school insisted that they have to be bought through the school shop at 400RMB -a clear rip-off.

JD rather likes the uniform though and was keen to be photographed in his "at attention" stance. The constant school "marching and dancing" seem to be having an effect on him!

70 and counting

30/9/2019

October 1st is the 70th Anniversary of the founding of the People's Republic of China - the country I currently call home. I was one of five teachers from the whole of Yunnan (pop: 50 million) invited to attend the Provincial Government's celebratory banquet in the swanky Green Lake Hotel. A very formal do. I even had to wear my one and only tie!

It was the usual affair. Men in black suits mixing with others from minority groups and nearby countries dressed in their ethnic costumes. A mercifully succinct speech extolling the glories of China kicked off the event. The food was quality over quantity, but more important were the various dignitaries going from table to table toasting each other. Then, after 90 minutes, it was announced that the reception was over and, within a few minutes, the fancy dining room had been vacated and people slowly drifted off home. All very Chinese!

But for all the cultural oddities, it is genuinely a really nice gesture to invite various foreigners along to what is, essentially, an event for patriotic Chinese to revel in the successes of their country. The respect and gratefulness of Chinese people towards foreigner workers can contrast strongly with the attitude to immigrants seen in many other countries...

Darth Minion

28/9/2019

Strange mash-up of Star Wars and Despicable Me!

Do it yourshelf

26/9/2019

We had workmen in for most of today and, by late this afternoon, we had a new wardrobe, five shelves, a hanging rack, four chairs, a table and three cupboards. We now have so much storage space that half of it is empty!

What's dat, den?

24/9/2019

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. We were delighted to find a new den built right next to ours in the Secret Forest the other day! Not quite up to our standards yet, but it's fun to know someone has been inspired by our ever-growing structure [see below]!

Nurse-sense

22/9/2019

JD had the last of his vaccinations yesterday. At long last!

Control yourselves

20/9/2019

JD's Primary School continues to be an education to me, if not to JD. Can this really be the top school in the city?? Today the teacher posted photos showing how "well-behaved and happy" the students are. Really?? They look scared and bored to me. JD's first three weeks seem to have been all about "control", with very little actual education. The kids get marked every day - with all the grades being sent to all the parents by phone. Most kids get "As" but JD usually gets "Bs". Why? Well, one day it was for "holding his pencil for a few seconds too long when the teacher had told pupils to put them down". Another day it was for "looking at the textbook when the teacher was talking". And another was for "raising his hand inappropriately to answer a question".

As a ex Primary School teacher myself, the "rows and columns" seating and the publicly published minor infringements seem all about the teacher keeping strict control, rather than having any education value. And woe betide any parents who fail to complete the multiple forms, the homework signing sheets or book purchases. They want control of us too!

[And if you're wondering where JD is in the picture above, we were told he was having a unscheduled trip to the toilet ...another "B"!!]

Popping out

18/9/2019

More e-bike upset at the weekend when JD and I hit a pothole and the rear tyre exploded! Fortunately we were pushing distance from a repair shop and, for the equivalent of £15, the mechanic quickly replaced the broken tyre and also the ageing back brakes. JD loved watching it all.

Shut up

16/9/2019

It actually means, "Way Out"!?

Eeeeeeeee-bikes

14/9/2019

Electric bikes are a huge part of life in Kunming. If I had to drive JD to school each morning by car it would take over 40 minutes, with many traffic jams on the way. By e-bike, it's 15 minutes. So it's alarming that the local government have recently announced that e-bikes will be phased out over the next 3-4 years. The car traffic, and associated pollution, will surely increase as a result. Crazy.

However, the downside of scooters is, of course, the safety factor. Although I've been driving one for five years without major incident, we were confronted with the reality of the danger a couple of days ago when an e-bike, speeding past us in a bus lane, lost control and crashed into our car. He wasn't wearing a helmet and suffered a bleeding head wound and bruising. Thankfully, nothing worse. In China, the law says that the "larger" of any two vehicles in a collision is automatically at fault, regardless of the actions or situation. Fortunately for us, though, the injured e-biker immediately insisted it was all his fault and even offered to pay for the repair of our car's dent. We declined that offer but were mightily relieved to see him driving away. It could have been a whole lot worse.

Flashback: This day in ...2008

12/9/2019

Another in my occasional series of "Flashbacks" looking back at blog entries made before this Weebly version started.

The recently opened Department Store over the entrance to my training school was displaying rather more than we really anticipated recently! Thankfully, we only saw the rear(s) view, but I'm quite sure it proved a distraction from our school's advertising!

I was asked to do some oral English work today to help prepare half a dozen young men and women for their all-important IELTS exam which they need to pass to be able to study abroad. Unfortunately, the list of possible subjects to talk about had been translated from Chinese by a computer and most of the mangled topics left me scratching my head. See if you can work them out. My top ten . . .

"The Chinese spends preparing food the time many few, on what food packing whether to take to prepare food in the home, to eat importantly?"
"Artware"
"Periphery description one animal kind."
"What describes first space study period scene except college most importantly regarding students? You thought now looked for the work with before what had distinguish?"
"About the birthday, with who how to have crossed, to be how interesting with."
The modern family and the beforehand parents divide the work have anything to be different. After the children growing up, hoped government makes anything be possible to have the help family."
"Most likes time section."
"International society is the animal on which how to rescue these to border on the exterminates. What do you have to move?"
"Side you cross ocean, feels what kind, you thought that what the seashore life does have to the person body to affect?"
"A matter which co-operates with the human."

Bake off

10/9/2019

JD and I attended a foreign teachers' Mid-Autumn Festival activity the other day to make traditional mooncakes. Other teachers also brought their kids and together we had a sticky, but successful, time with the finished products look pretty professional and tasting jolly good too. My Vietnamese friend Cao [to my right, below] came with her two kids (FeiJi and YoLun) and we realised it was exactly a year since we first met (at last year's cake event).

Believe it or not...

8/9/2019

I got some fascinating facts through yesterday from the British Embassy eg Some 30,000 Brits live in China, with over 100 of them in jail!

Green with envy

6/9/2019

JD's latest obsession is playing Monopoly. He has a firm grasp on the rules and tactics, but does favour the green set above all others. We've been playing almost every day of late, sometimes twice in a row. It's great for his Maths and English. He charged me £26 yesterday for landing on his property before spotting he had the whole set and immediately saying, "Oh no, £52! And on the e-bike to school this morning he suddenly asked me what "annuity matures" means! He only wins about one game in four at the moment though and has to choke back the tears when his houses get removed.

adj, adj, adj, verb...?

4/9/2019

Thumbs up?

2/9/2019

Last week was a steep learning curve both for JD and his parents! He has had multiple random and nonsensical school rules to get used to while learning dance routines for hours every day. Meanwhile Jiajia has had to trawl through well over 50 texts a day from the school ranging from what the maths homework is (received at 9.40pm - to be handed in the next day) to how the school expects pencils to be sharpened. We are trying to bite our tongues, especially in front of JD, but it seems like Chinese schools are indeed as disorganised and petty as we'd been led to believe.

JD managed to get 10/10 "thumbs up" stickers most days last week. He had a bit of a wobble on Tuesday, getting told off for "whispering in class", "not dancing energetically enough" and "allowing his elbow to lose contact with his desk while trying to volunteer an answer"!? We had to apologise to the teacher and give JD a "stern" reprimand at home!? To try and get back into the teacher's good books, we have agreed to let JD represent the school in an "English Speaking Competition". Fingers crossed!

Going, going, unigorn...

30/8/2019

"Even if nobody pays attention to it, there will be a place that
always supports very, very important encounters in the heart."

Five alive

28/8/2019

Five on an e-bike! Eeek!

Of primary concern

26/8/2019

JD started Primary School today. Through various devious means we managed to get him a place in the "best" Primary School in the city and so he is now in a class of 40 - one class out of a 10-class intake.

The first day was the usual Chinese chaos. We were told to arrive at school at 8am, until a text at 11.40pm the previous day which changed the time to 8.30am. Guards at the school initially wouldn't let anyone in without seeing a text message on their phone - a message which hadn't been sent. And on arrival at the classroom we were asked to hand in a copy of out house registration - something nobody had brought since nobody had been told it was required. and so on...

Rather alarmingly, the white circular machines [such as the one above left] hang on walls around the school. So far, nobody I've asked can tell me what they are! Worrying...

Fun and games

24/8/2019

When we are in the UK this Summer my brother Andy visited with his kids, Louie and Daisy. They gave JD a wonderful home-made quiz book all about him, Britain and his British family. We've been completing parts of it together each night this week. Great fun. Thanks chaps!

Mosstake?

22/8/2019

Sounds like a fun night out!

Not speaking up

20/8/2019

I'm half way through my August IELTS examining commitments. It's a long day dealing with 19-22 candidates one-by-one, each expecting their 15 minutes of 100% focus from the examiner as, for many, it can be a life-changing exam. Some barely have enough English to form a sentence, some could speak OK if it wasn't for their crippling nerves and a few are talented enough to score well.

Security is very high with metal detectors, documents signed in and out and electrical recorders locked up over lunch. And no phones or cameras are allowed in the room - hence the mocked up photo above!

The E ological

18/8/2019

In a country where religion is largely frowned on, it's
really odd to see so many e-bikes with this on their sides.

Not quite perfect!

16/8/2019

Weather to live here or there

14/8/2019

Can't complain about the weather here these days!